When someone connected to the Armed Forces dies, the impact can extend far beyond grief. While every bereavement is different, Military Bereavement can bring unique challenges for families, from coping with Military grief and changes to identity and community, to concerns around mental health, finances, education and accessing Military Bereavement Support.
Understanding these challenges, including navigating Military Bereavement Entitlements, is vital to ensuring families receive the help they need.
Carla Rose-Hardman, Head of Service at Scotty’s – the military bereavement charity explains.
Everyone experiences grief differently, and Armed Forces grief is no exception. The circumstances surrounding a death, the relationship with the person who died and the support available can all shape how someone experiences bereavement. For military-connected families, these experiences may be further influenced by the unique circumstances of military life and the challenges that follow the death of a loved one.
Military bereavement is not necessarily harder than other types of bereavement, but it can come with particular circumstances that can affect how someone experiences grief and what they need afterwards.
Through my work at Scotty’s with those affected by military grief and bereavement, I’ve seen how these additional factors can shape someone’s life, sometimes for many years after a death.
Military bereavement can mean losing a community
Military life can create a strong sense of belonging and identity. Families may live alongside other military families, share experiences and build friendships around service life.
When someone dies, that sense of community can change too.
A family may leave military accommodation, lose connections or no longer feel that they belong in the same way. For someone who has never been part of the military community, this particular dimension of bereavement may not be part of their experience.
Scotty’s SMILES Programme gives people the chance to build social connections, bringing together people who understand the experience of military-connected bereavement.
Our Bereaved Military Community (BMC) Insights Survey 2026, completed by 210 people affected by military-connected bereavement, found that 85% had felt isolated or alone following bereavement, while 58% felt less connected to the military community. A further 68% wanted more opportunities to meet people with shared experience.
This matters because connection can be an important part of rebuilding a sense of belonging after bereavement.
There can be a practical side to military bereavement too
All bereavement can bring practical challenges. But military families may also have to navigate pensions, compensation, housing and other military-specific entitlements following a death.
This can be particularly difficult at a time when someone is grieving and may have very little capacity to deal with complex information or unfamiliar systems.
Scotty’s START Programme provides confidence and clarity in navigating their entitlements, helping people understand what support may be available to them.
For us, this is an important part of bereavement support. Helping someone navigate a pension or understand an entitlement might appear to be a practical issue but resolving that uncertainty can remove a significant source of additional stress.
The impact can reach into education and employment
Military bereavement can affect a person's ability to work, study and plan for the future, whatever the circumstances of the death.
For children and young people, experiencing the death of a parent or loved one can affect education, relationships and aspirations. For adults, bereavement can affect confidence, employment and financial stability.
Our BMC Insights Survey found that 76% of respondents found work or school difficult following bereavement, while 26% needed to find new employment and 17% found their employer or school actively unsupportive.
Scotty’s STRIDES Programme provides outstanding development opportunities, supporting people to continue progressing with their education, employment and aspirations following bereavement.
The aim is not to suggest that bereavement should simply be something people “move on” from. It is about recognising that people continue to have lives, ambitions and futures alongside their grief — and sometimes need support to navigate them.
Military grief can affect mental health
The emotional impact of bereavement is, of course, at the heart of the experience.
For some people, grief can have a significant impact on their mental health. The circumstances surrounding a death can also bring additional complexity, particularly where a death was traumatic or involved suicide.
But there is no single experience of military bereavement, and no single timeline for needing support. Someone may need help immediately after a death. Someone else may cope for years before reaching a point where they are ready to talk about what happened.
Scotty’s SUPPORT Programme provides the very best mental health and wellbeing support, recognising that people experience bereavement differently and that their needs can change over time.
Looking at the whole person
The biggest lesson I’ve learnt through my work at Scotty’s is that grief is only part of someone's experience of bereavement.
That doesn't make military bereavement worse than other forms of bereavement. It means there are particular circumstances that can sit alongside grief and shape what happens next.
For some armed forces families, that might be losing their community or military identity. For others, it might be navigating unfamiliar entitlements, supporting a child through education, managing changes to employment or finding appropriate mental health support.
And for many people, it will be a combination of several things.
That is why Scotty’s takes a holistic approach to military-connected bereavement. Its four programmes: START, SMILES, SUPPORT and STRIDES are designed to respond to different practical, social, emotional and developmental needs.
Because while every bereavement is different, understanding the circumstances around someone’s bereavement can make a real difference to the support they receive.
That is why Scotty’s is now here to support anyone impacted by military bereavement, adults and children, no matter their relationship to the person who died or the cause of death.
If you are affected by military grief and bereavement, please reach out to Scotty’s military bereavement support team to find out how we can help you and connect you with people who truly understand.
